You are unhappy and not because the situation you find yourself in is particular bad it’s simply not the place you envisioned in years gone by.
You’ve been worn down by the constant need to motivate yourself to achieve excellence in an area that offers you no real personal satisfaction. Your natural ability enables you to thrive within unfavorable surroundings but the numerous accolades you have received count for naught.
A Boxer cares not for his award for the best smile, when he has yet to have the championship around his waist.
Your current tasks are simply a means to an end but the end seems out of reach.
You motivate others to step out of their comfort zone but you become frozen with fear when you are challenged to practice what you preach. You are afraid.
Afraid of what? Afraid of failure and the fear of failure is far more debilitating than fear of death. This fear consumes courage, strips joy from your very breath until only negativity and self-pity is left.
Like a parasite you look to others to fuel your desire but when pushed to take the same steps already travelled, your response, that is simply a cowardice excuses is immediate and predictable.
You do have a real desire for success but your fear holds you down beneath the waves of negative justification and false substantiation.
You are right to say you can’t and not because you are unable to achieve success but simply because you won’t try.
True failure is not losing, it’s simply not trying and never knowing what may have been.
Photographs by kirsten ashleigh mackrill Make up Shelby Lee Souma Hair Tracey Serfontein Star Style